The greatest self-esteem building gift you can give your child is complete acceptance of their preferences in life.

If your child states that they would like to learn to play the saxophone, what do you think is better answer as a parent? Would it be best to explain that saxophone rental is fairly expensive, and that maybe they should consider piano lessons instead because you already own a piano and it’s a much better instrument to play solo, and you can’t really sing with your instrument if you are blowing a horn. Basically that it is much more practical. Or is it best to say “that’s a great choice. What do you like about the saxophone? What is inspiring this new desire? Would you like to investigate getting lessons and go to the music store to look at saxophones together?”

It seems pretty obvious, doesn’t it? One answer requires justification and is heavily burdened with your judgment and preference. The other feels of acceptance, and nurtures more free natural thinking, and inspiration.

Let’s use an even simpler example. If your child is riding in the car with you and states a preference to stop at the sporting goods store, don’t hammer them with your need for a long practical explanation of why it is really necessary. Don’t tell them it’s not on the way home, or that you don’t have any extra money right now, or make them explain what exactly they need to look at. Simply do it.

Stop at the sporting goods store and have an adventure. Let your child remind you what it feels like to simply follow a whim. Join them on the adventure, and state that you are excited to see what they want to look at. Who knows, you might learn a great life lesson, or perhaps meet someone amazing.

Kids are really good at following their whims and promptings, and you can really learn from them. You will also be teaching them that it is great to follow your inner promptings and desires. You will help them to experience and learn to trust their own feelings, which will be a great self-esteem and self-worth building tool.

Not only is this one of the greatest gifts you can give your child, self-esteem, but also you will build trust and keep the lines of communication open between you and them. You will really cherish this open communication later in life, and it is a wonderful feeling for them knowing they can come to you with any preference or issue in their lives and not be scolded or judged based on your life experience.

Trust and communication. Hmmm, sounds good doesn’t it? Perhaps it would be something worth trying with every relationship in your life.